2 Big Bald Guys

Both drafted No. 1 overall, both Super Bowl Champions. Peyton has multiple league MVP awards and a Super Bowl MVP. Eli has never won league MVP but has two Super Bowl MVPs. Peyton got his championship first but Eli has two now.

Both were born and bred to play football and the argument continues to rage on. Naturally the question that every football fan want to know: Which of Archie’s boys is funnier?

With this week’s SNL appearance by Eli we may be one step closer to an answer.

Below are two samples of their work “influencing” the lives of our nations youth.

So who ya got?

For my money it’s Peyton by a mile.

I don’t know why I have to write this because it seems pretty obvious to me but I think we can alleviate a lot of distress if we all can agree on this one point. Men are prideful.

It’s not something we try to be. It’s not something we’re particularly proud of (no pun intended). But nonetheless at our center we are full of pride.

Sure we can suppress this and appear humble, but acts of humility do not make one humble.

Ladies, take everything that bothers you about men and it all comes back to pride. The much maligned “ask for directions” situation. Pride. Inordinately and irrationally confident about his body. Pride. Resists holding your purse in public. Pride. Failure to recognize Father Time’s repeated messages that he ought to avoid contact/extreme sports at his age. Pride. Always believing he has the answer no matter how little experience he has on the topic. Pride. Taking on nearly any bet or challenge no matter how ridiculous. Pride. Failing to admit he is wr…wro…wr…not always exactly 100% in the right, sometimes. Pride.

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In this 24 hour news and social media saturated society it’s easy to get caught up in the latest hype when a good (or in this case GREAT) story comes along.

Everybody has an opinion or a take on what and why this is happening. You can’t turn on the TV or check Facebook and Twitter without being confronted by it. You might have even gotten caught up in it yourself tweeting a clever, at least in your own mind, pun or twelve. There’s no shame in this (at least no shame you’ll admit to).

In the beginning it’s fun, exciting and entertaining. Sure you can’t escape it but you really don’t want to. (Don’t pretend you didn’t enjoy Tebowmania just a little bit. Residence of Oakland, San Diego, Kansas City, New York, Minnesota, Chicago and Pittsburg excluded of course). But there will come a time when this story loses steam or becomes played out or boring. How long really depends on the magnitude of the situation and the individual’s tolerance for the story.

While the story is hot though it’s natural to sound off and join the ever growing chorus surrounding the circus; amplifying the hype and eventually contributing to its downfall.

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It’s well documented that Americans, as a whole, are a little bit on the hefty side.  Fine!  Outside of Keira Knightley we could all stand to miss a few meals.  As Americans the only thing we like more than food is assigning blame.  So who or what is to blame?

I let my children watch a part of Supersize Me a couple of weeks ago.  While I laugh to myself as they shutter with disgust any time we drive by a McDonald’s now, I fear they may have missed the point.  My 4 year old says to me, “You’re not fat.  You don’t eat McDonald’s.”  As if that redheaded clown is the sole reason for obesity.

McDonald’s or even fast food in general isn’t the problem; although they aren’t helping.  I’m talking to you McRib.  As with any problem of this scale it’s complicated.

I’m going to gloss over personal responsibility, prosperity and mental health issues because let’s be honest those are all kind of downers (we eat to feel better because we can.  Sad face).  I’m going to focus on our mindset and obsession with food.

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